I Am Fashion's Bitch

My quest to be fashionable has left me very irritated this morning. It’s raining like a mofo so the bottoms of my jeans (which are longish – all part of that fashion quest) are drenched. Because I’m wearing sling-backs (also part of the quest) the wet part of my jeans keep touching the skin on my foot, sending a gross shiver up my spine.

Why can’t big over-the-pants galoshes be in vogue? Surely if people embraced Uggs, galoshes couldn’t be too far away, right?

I have to laugh at fashion (and mainly myself!) sometimes because it’s funny how you can start liking something clothing-wise that you thought looked so silly a few months earlier. For example, I recently bought a shrug. It looks kinda like this one on the right (mine has slightly longer sleeves, though).

A year ago, I thought shrugs were the dumbest thing. I recall seeing Cher wearing one in some video and thinking “Eck, I hope THAT doesn’t catch on.”

Fast-forward to now and I’m busting out my ninja moves to beat out the women at Winners for one. By ninja moves, I just mean that I stealthily yet quickly sneak toward the item I want without being detected. It’s all about keeping your cool. At Winners, if you leap all anxiously toward something, the surrounding women will immediately sense it and will instinctively start running toward whatever you’re after. It’s like a group of pigeons that see another bird dive-bombing nearby – they all KNOW there’s gotta be, like, a whole bagel or something on the ground for that other bird to be so speedy, so they all swoop in to snatch whatever the keen bird was heading for. That’s what shopping at Winners is like. It’s an art form and a strategy.

But where was I? Oh – right, my shrug. In a few months I’m sure I’ll desert it. But right now, I’m loving it. How did that happen???