The Only Thing Missing is a Never-ending Discovery of Miniature, Flattened Cat Bodies

From the Hoarders-inspired art series, Barbie Trashes Her Dreamhouse, by Carrie M. Becker.

My life will be complete if she creates a miniature version of a stockpiling room from Extreme Couponing.

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Overheard ... The Worst Argument For Cats

Image Source:
PetUniversity.com

I took a break from work and writing today to pick up some books at the local library (I really, really, really love libraries. Hug a librarian today!). I ended up waiting in line behind two women who were in one of those pointless arguments that most people only have when they're under 12 or over the limit.

Team Paw: I just don't understand how anyone could prefer a cat over a dog. A dog returns your affections, a dog can be trained ...

Team Claw: But a dog is also messy and can do more damage. Cats are simply regal - and they DO return affection.

Team Paw: Cats can do plenty of damage - and usually they're not friendly. Plus, dogs are far more intelligent.

Team Claw: *Smug* My dear, the superiority of cats just can't be argued. As they say, dogs have masters, cats have staff!

You see, that's not an argument for cats, that's an argument against the intelligence of cat owners. Whenever people say that tired old line, I want to shout, "you realize that makes you 'the staff', right? You've just proudly announced that you're the willing servant to a spastic, crotch-licking, moody ball of fur and dander that is too stupid or lazy to learn its own name.Therefore, I really can't trust your judgment on anything."

I didn't say that though. That would be catty. Arf. Arf. Arf.

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This is How Much I Hate Cats

There's a story in the news right now about some nutbag who planned to eat his cat after it was "mean" to him:

When Ferry-Fillmore District officers pulled over a car driven by Gary L. Korkuc on Sunday night during a traffic stop, they said they heard a cat crying from inside the trunk and investigated.

What they found has left animal lovers at the SPCA Serving Erie County in shock.

The cat, according to police, was in a cage “marinating” in a mixture of crushed red peppers, chili pepper, salt and oil.

“It’s disgusting. It surprises me every day what people are capable of when it comes to violence, whether it is animals or people,” said Gina M. Browning, the SPCA’s director of public relations. “I’ve never heard of anything like this before.”

And the thing that struck me most about this story?

This guy has no idea how to cook.

Seriously, who puts the marinade on the fur?

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I Support Anything That Supports My Cat Theory

My theory is this: They are evil. This one, especially:



Kat is from an alien planet and is hell-bent on destruction. Kid (Coop) is the only one who realizes it. Kat is intent on bringing Kid down.

One of the ladies on Hitched is the post-production supervisor of this show, Kid Vs. Kat, which is even more reason to love it. Settle in with a bowl of Lucky Charms and tune into YTV on Saturdays to catch the mayhem.

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I Really Should Stop Talking To Strangers

Today on the subway, a very frazzled-looking woman boarded with a large cardboard banker's box that had a couple little holes punched into it randomly. I guess this woman was rather distracted this evening, because she apparently forgot about this little thing called inertia. As the subway lurched, so did she and so did her box, right out of her hands.

The box hit the ground hard, the woman yelped and snatched it up quickly, looking quite distraught.

Girl next to me, talking to her friend: OMG, it would be so horrible if there was a puppy in that box.

Me: But if it was a cat - that would be AWESOME. [Note: Not being sarcastic]

Girl & Friend: *Stoney silence and look of disgust on their faces.*

Me: Ahh ... hehe. *Getting off subway one stop early to flee situation.*

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