10 May 2011

The Jersey Shore Colour Palette

This picture of the Jersey Shore cast is from an article on Jezebel. The whole gang is apparently in Italy and are up to their wacky hijinks, Eurotrash Style. I don't want to spoil the new season for anyone, but I'm guessing we'll be seeing Ronnie and Sammi fighting, Ronnie and Sammi making up, everybody getting drunk, a new acronym that will describe something related to hygiene or sexual encounters, everybody dancing badly, everybody trying to get laid, everybody succeeding in that except for Snooki, and the desecration of at least one Renaissance-era landmark.

But enough about the plot - I'm all about that picture. What colour are these people? Let's find out:
I actually think this little palette sample of the Jersey Shore skin tones - which I lifted from the picture using Photoshop's Eyedropper Tool - is pretty accurate. I saw Pauly D in Vegas in January and the guy looked straight-up Indian. If it wasn't for his hair and his squawking of "T-shirt time, yeah!" he could blend right into any street of Calcutta.

Not surprisingly, the most non-human of the bunch is Snooki. It She reminds me of that horrible Arizona / Southwest / Tuscan / Santa Fe terracotta decorating style that was so popular a couple decades ago. Just put her in some turquoise earrings, a cream-coloured dress, some Pauly D-brown boots and place her next to a cactus and you have the makings of a Better Homes and Gardens cover from 1992.

Hilariously, the exact shade of Snooki on ColorLovers is called "Good Time":

I think that would make her happy.

But more captivating than their colours is how reflective they all are! I don't just mean reflective of our decaying culture and how we've gone wrong as a society, but of light. Those foreheads are like high beams. Perhaps Guido is the new energy source? It's toxic as hell, but, boy, does it ever burn brightly.


Anonymous,  12:35 pm, May 10, 2011  

Hahahaha. Snooki should get her own Pantone. How does one do that to themselves? I get spray tanning, but that is nuts!

Ali,  2:42 pm, May 10, 2011  

She IS terracotta! I'd hate to see what she looks like 20 years.

Meg @ write meg! 2:49 pm, May 10, 2011  

Oh my. They are ridiculously reflective, aren't they? I was just thinking about shiny those foreheads are -- ick. That's the sort of thing I try to mask with tons of face powder.

Nicky,  8:18 pm, May 10, 2011  

"Here comes a greaseball!" Five points for the person who knows what I'm referencing.

Jennifer,  10:46 pm, May 10, 2011  

Hey! Luigi bring-a you a free pizza!

Unknown 7:01 pm, May 11, 2011  

Wow, I have to remember not to drink and read your posts at the same time. You almost killed me.

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Need words? I'm a Toronto-based freelance writer who injects great ones into blogs, websites, magazines, ads and more. So many services, one lovely Jen (with one 'n').

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