6 Jan 2012

How Many Tacos Will This Buy Me In Heaven?

I received this in the mail today from someone who reads my blog:

Um, thanks?

I will say, however, that it sure beats the email I received a month ago from someone who attached a copy of her TV cable bill and asked if I wouldn't mind paying it "as a way of saying thank you for being a blog reader". Yes, that's right, I should be paying you to read this blog (that is, when you're not watching TV, of course!). What's more, the "fan" suggested that I surely must have "come into wealth" from all the traffic on this website, much of which she feels she contributed to by "posting the 50s experiment on Facebook".

Guys, the only profit that I've directly reaped from his blog is pictured above:  a Seven Dollar Jesus Bill - and I'm pretty sure I can't even redeem that until I've a) accepted Him as my Lord and Saviour; and b) died.

You know, if this is what I receive, it really makes you wonder about the kind of mail Oprah gets. Just take a minute and picture it.



Anonymous,  2:26 pm, January 06, 2012  

uhm ...WOW!! Speechless!

Terri W

Karen 2:37 pm, January 06, 2012  

WHAT?! That is crazy. All of it.

BloggerBride 3:52 pm, January 06, 2012  

I once had a dollar bill with James Dean on it. Same difference.

Anonymous,  4:27 pm, January 06, 2012  

Answer: 15 Tacos.

Jess @ It's Jess! 4:37 pm, January 06, 2012  

So you paid the bill though... right?

Also... what is your address? I have an out of control T-Mobile bill this month.

G 5:06 pm, January 06, 2012  

I guess I should try that tactic.

Hey, I "liked" your facebook page, so can I get a free haircut?

I looked up your restaurant on Google, so can I eat for free?

Here's a copy of my credit card statement public library. I'm reading all these books for you, I should get something out of it!

Anonymous,  6:23 pm, January 06, 2012  


Give me your address! I have all kinds of crazy to send you!

And no, that wasn't your foot tapping...


JacquiG 7:29 pm, January 06, 2012  

Seriously!!?? Unbelievable!! I have no other words!

Father of the Monkey,  2:41 am, January 08, 2012  

You are making that up.

In fact, you are lying. Liar. You're a liar.

At least I hope so. The only alternative is that there really is someone that whacko out there.

Jen 4:57 pm, January 11, 2012  

Terri W - YEP.

Karen - I know, right? But I kind of like the Jesus Dollar.

BloggerBride - Do you *still* have the James Dean Dollar? Because that should be framed.

Anon 2 - Ha. Thank you! I will therefore hang onto my Jesus Dollar for future heavenly snacking.

Jess - Har. To everyone's shock and surprise, I did not pay the bill.

G - Ha. Valiant effort.

Frode - Gah! The dreaded non-foot tap! From beyond!

Jacqui - Some of the emails I get are pretty epic - that one was just extra special.

FOTM - I swear on my Jesus Dollar that it's all true. All sadly, sadly true.

lisa.skinner 12:58 pm, January 12, 2012  

Geez lady despite how we may feel sometimes, cable, and the internet for that matter, are not essential services like say, food or heat. If you can't afford your cable bill, you don't get to have cable. You don't just get to bill a baller like Jen over here! :)

Di Smith 9:02 am, January 13, 2012  

Oh my. That is too funny. And sorta sad. But man, how good must it feel to get fan mail? (Um, I'm still waiting on mine)

happy wheels unblocked 6:26 am, September 09, 2015  

Haha! Isn't it nice when you have a fan mail? The "Seven Dollar Jesus Bill" :))
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I really like tacos. But I do not believe in the existence of hell and heaven. On this I think that after death, I do not "shine")

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Need words? I'm a Toronto-based freelance writer who injects great ones into blogs, websites, magazines, ads and more. So many services, one lovely Jen (with one 'n').

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