15 Sep 2005

Have You Tried The Pepsi Challenge?

I have put a test before Patrick: He must go one week without any Diet Pepsi. He cannot substitute it with Coke, Diet Coke or snorting coke. It will be interesting.

Why such a challenge? Because the love affair that boy has with the beverage is unnatural. Immoral. Maybe even a little pervy. The amount of Diet Pepsi he drinks requires us to make “DP Runs” to the store about five times a week. Our blue box outside is always embarrassingly flooded with Diet Pepsi carcasses. He pees brown.

It’s my fault he’s this bad though. He used to drink regular Coke on a normal-ish scale until I nagged that regular Coke was filled with sugar and calories and blah-diet-blah. He tried Diet Coke but he didn’t enjoy it. Already of fan of Diet Pepsi, I brought it over to his place for him to try. And he was hooked, like that. You could say I was his Tamborine Man, but we won’t. With the knowledge that this new-fangled drink contained no calories at all (although how many cancer causing agents are in it, only time will tell), he started to indulge. And indulge. And indulge.

Hence, the brown pee.

To get him to kick the habit, I’ve challenged* him to a week without it. This morning marks the start of Day 1.

I will keep you informed on the progress.

* 1950's Housewife Tip #1: Ladies, suggesting your man take on a “challenge” is much more effective than explaining or rationalizing your concern! Men like to show you how tough they are – if you try to play the role of the brainy one with him, why, you’ll just make that man feel insignificant! Remember your place!

2 comments:

Pam,  11:50 am, September 15, 2005  

Jen - Patrick must be related to my husband. We now resort to buying DP from Costco on a weekly basis. Brown pee stinks - literally. Have you also banned coffee?

BTW - love your blog funnee lady!

Jen 9:16 pm, September 15, 2005  

Thanks, Pam. :) The DP is the only beverage not on the menu for him this week. To take his coffee away would be too much withdrawal at once!

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Need words? I'm a Toronto-based freelance writer who injects great ones into blogs, websites, magazines, ads and more. So many services, one lovely Jen (with one 'n').

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